Birthday Surprises
by Cofkett
Summary: Castle gets surprised on his birthday.
1. This Chapter is about Meredith

They could not get through the door fast enough, hands and lips entangled as they stumbled, laughing, to the bed. It had been a long, hard day, full of stolen glances and the briefest of touches under the cloak of professionalism. She loved her job, but it almost was not worth it to have to work side by side with him all day without being able to do something about it - especially today of all days. But now she had him all to herself, his eagerness apparent as he rid her of her top and kissed his way down her body, pulling down her underwear to taste her.

She gasped his name as his tongue did absolutely marvellous things to her with his mouth, thrusting her hips toward him in wanton desire. His fingers replaced his tongue inside her as he sucked on her bundle of nerves. She gripped the sheets as her body convulsed in pleasure.

"Mm," she moaned. "_Oh, oh, yes_!" she screamed.

His smug grin greeted her as she looked up.

She pulled him up to place fierce kisses on his lips.  
"Take me," she begged. "Now."

"Your wish is my command," he replied, entering her in one quick thrust. She sighed and flipped him over, riding him with abandon and digging her nails into his shoulders, letting out a string of expletives. At first she didn't hear the phone ring, so caught up was she in the haze of fantastic sex, but when she realised someone was calling her, she stopped her movements.

"Ignore it," he groaned.

She smiled, kissing him as she reluctantly climbed off of his body.  
"Can't. Might be important." She slowed her breathing, attempting to compose herself before answering. "Hello."

_"Sweetheart, how was work?_"

She stared guiltily at her lover and hastily turned, suddenly feeling the need to cover up with a sheet as she sat on the edge of the bed.  
"Hey, Rick. Uh, it - it was fine."

"_I miss you_."

"Me, too."

"Who's that?" James whispered from behind her.

She covered the mouth piece and glanced at him over her shoulder as she replied.  
"My husband."

**Just so you know, this is not going to turn out to be a dream. Nor is it A/U or OOC. I completely believe in this story and that I'm being 100% true to all the characters, even if it means painting a character I truly like in a poor light. I feel it's necessary. If you disagree, that's cool. BTW, I'm posting this at 8:30pm March 31st. I'm curious; what time is it in Kirimiati right now? Do I have any readers from there? I like to be inclusive of all time-zones.**


	2. 1998

**April fools!**

**Posting this at 8:30 my time. Honolulu, it's coming up on 12:00am second of April your timel, right? Which means it's no longer April Fool's Day anywhere in the world, and it's the end of my little prank. But it sure was fun while it lasted.**

* * *

"_You still there_?"

"Yes, yes, Richard; I'm here. How's Alexis?"

"_Great. I mean, she misses you. We'll both be glad to see you come back on Sunday."_

"Uh, actually, it's tomorrow. We wrapped tonight."

"_That was tonight? Oh, I'm sorry; I must have gotten the dates wrong. But yay! You're coming home a day earlier than I thought! How do you feel about the work that you did?"_

"Pretty, good. I'm proud of the film."

"_Well, I'm proud of my sexy, talented wife. How lucky am I? Baby, when you get home_ - "

She chuckled.  
"I'm looking forward to it, Ricky."

"_Me, too. So, uh, everything work out with the Director? I know you were complaining he was a bit hard on you._"

Meredith peered up at her bed companion.  
"Oh, well, James is just very specific about what he wants, and once I delivered that, he was much more agreeable; and we've actually gotten along very well these last few days."

"_Well, good, I'm glad."_

"Can I talk to Alexis?"

"_Um... she's asleep, honey. It's Eleven 'o'clock. You were supposed to call_ - "

"Right, right I'm sorry; I was caught up at the wrap party."

"_It's ok; we'll see you tomorrow." _

"Can't wait."

_ "Me neither. Love you." _

"Love you, too." She hung up and looked at James, who was staring at her. "What? Don't pretend you didn't know I was married."

"Oh, I knew. Who's Alexis?" he asked.

"My daughter," she replied.

"See, that I didn't know. You have a kid."

"Yeah. That a problem?" she asked.

"No... I just... your body is amazing. How is that possible?"

She grinned.  
"Well, it's not what it was before I had her but I work hard to keep in shape."

"I appreciate it," he said, nibbling her neck. "So what does this husband of yours do?"

She stood up and headed for the en suite bathroom.  
"He writes novels."

"Oh. So, you're the breadwinner, I take it?"

"Actually... he's written eight bestsellers. He can work from home, be with Alexis - he's a wonderful father - and we can afford for me to do what I want thanks to his success. He takes very good care of me."

"Obviously not good enough if you're here with me," James said.

"Sorry to break it to you, but Richard is an amazing lover."

"Then why are you cheating on him if he's rich, good in bed and a good father? Do you not love him?"

"Of course I love him; what's that got to do with anything? He's there and I'm here. A woman has needs, James. But make no mistake; this is just sex."

"So you're saying I'm a glorified vibrator."

She quirked an eyebrow. "Now what's wrong with that?"

He shrugged, unwrapping the sheet and pulling her into the shower.  
"Nothing." He smirked, turning on the water. "Bzzzzzzz."

She laughed as he took her under the warm stream of water.

* * *

**I did something similar to this last year and the reaction was even more overwhelming this time around. Thank you so much. Kudos to those who figured it out. To those who didn't, I'm sorry. Except I'm really not. **

**There are responses to the guest reviews on my tumblr (cofkett). Last time I did this, I lost a follower, so I do understand if people take this personally. However, this is my sense of humour and I won't apologise for it.**

**This story has a few more chapters in it. We'll be time-jumping and the title (and summary) will become relevant. **


	3. Check

**Again, I'd like to thank everyone who has followed/faved/reviewed this fic. It was just supposed to be a silly little April Fools Joke - not that I wasn't going to continue it but I didn't expect the interest would be this big, especially after the somewhat sour reaction I got last year. The reviews were mostly positive after the reveal, but I got some PMs (lol PMS) from people who'd taken it rather personally; one even stopped following the fic all together because of it. The response this time around seems a lot more good-humoured and understanding, which is great. I'd also like to thank everyone who nominated How Many Ways t Say I Love You for Favourite Fic You're Not Reading in the Castle Fanfic Writers Guild Awards. I think a substantial amount of people reading this fic HAVE read it and it's actually my most read fic to date, but the criteria technically allowed me to be nominated so I'm not complaining! There are a whole lot of other awesome fics nominated, so go check them out! I think I'll read one category a day. Ok, enjoy this chapter!  
[EDIT: Just received word from an awesome reviewer that a certain line in this chapter almost led to destruction of furniture. So, beware. Potential breakage of objects/regurgitation of food awaits if you proceed]  
**

_A Few Months Later... _

"Eggs?"

"Check."

"Milk?

"Check."

"Vanilla essence?"

"Check."

"Flour?"

"Check."

"Bicarbonate soda?"

Alexis leaned over and squinted to read the writing on the blue box.  
"Check!"

"Sugar?"

"Check."

"Milk?"

"Check."

"Butter?"

"Check."

"Lightsabers?"

Alexis giggled.  
"We don't have any lightsabers, Daddy."

"We don't?"

She grinned and shook her head.

"Well, that's a bit of a pickle. How are we supposed to make pancakes without light-sabers?"

Alexis shrugged.

He sighed.  
"I guess we'll just have to make do. Alexis, remind me to buy us some so we'll be prepared next time."

"I will, Daddy."

He rubbed his hands together.  
"Ok, let's get started. First, Alexis, I want you to pour - "

"Wait, Daddy."

"What?"

"We haven't washed our hands yet."

"Oh, Pumpkin, our hands are clean."

"But you can't see the tiny bacteria. How do you know?"

He beamed at her in pride.  
"Well, Alexis, if you know about bacteria, maybe you know that there are good bacteria. We don't want to kill the good bacteria, do we?"

"But what about the pathogenic micro-orgasms?"

Castle choked and cleared his throat.  
"Um... sorry honey, did you mean microorganisms?"

"Uh-huh. Isn't that what I said?"

Castle's eyes widened.

"Uh - yeah," he chuckled uneasily,"of course, of course. Hey," he said, whisking her up off the footstool and into the bathroom, eliciting an excited squeal from his daughter, "let's get you cleaned up, you messy little grub."_  
_


	4. Daughter of the Milllennium

"Ok, I think we're ready to get going. Unless there's something else I forgot to do."

"What about the condiments, Daddy?"

"Ah! So many big words! We can take those out later; don't want them to melt. Anything else?"

She shook her head.

"Alright." He stood Behind Alexis. "Now, sweetie, very carefully pour the milk into the cup," he said, supporting the carton as she poured it. "Very good, that's enough. Now we're going to pour the milk into the bowl. Great job!"

"That's easy," Alexis said.

"Well, this part gets a little tricky. Because now, we're going to pour again it into the cup but only halfway. That's right. Easy, easy, stop. Good. Perfect. Now we pour again. Ok," he said as they gently put the carton down and he put it back in the fridge. "Ready for the fun part?"

"Do I get to crack the eggs?"

"You sure do!"

He gently placed and egg in her tiny hands.

"You got it?"

"I got it, Daddy!"

"Ok," he said, grabbing an egg, "like this." He demonstrated. The yolk and white fell perfectly, staying tact into the jug. He put the shells down. "Your turn."

She tried cracking the egg and made a small crack in the egg.

"Ok, good honey, a little harder."

She did as he said and cracked the egg into the jug, the yolk running into the mixture.

"It's broken," she said, crestfallen.

"That's ok, sweetie, we're going to whisk them any way. You ever had a pancake where you could see the egg?"

She giggled.  
"No."

"No! That's an omelette! We're not making omelettes, are we?"

She shook her head.

"What are we making?"

"Pancakes!"

"That's right and you're doing an awesome job," he said, grabbing the whisk and placing her hand on it, guiding it to whisk the mixture.

"Daddy," she said after a few minutes, "my arm's getting tired."

"Oh, don't worry Pumpkin, you've done an excellent job," he said, taking over. "Just needs a few more." He finished whisking.

"Ok, now, I'm going to grab the sifter," he said, picking it up and holding it over a bowl. "I need you to hold it steady."

"Yes, Daddy."

"God job," he said gradually releasing.

"Now I'm going to slowly pour the flour in," he said, doing before putting the cup down and gently guiding her movements. "Sift; sift; sift."

She giggled.

"Sift!" They said in unison. "Sift! Sift!"

"Amazing. Ok, now for the bicarb soda. Sift! Sift!"

"Sift sift!"

"Yes, you know it! Now we stir in the sugar," he said, pouring in the sugar and giving her a spoon. "Yeah, stir, it, stir it, you go, girl. Great!"  
"Now, we combine them," he said, helping her to pour the jug of milk and eggs into the bowl. "Ok, this next part is just for Daddy, ok? But you watch me because one day you're going to be doing this yourself, when you're old enough."

"Ok, Daddy!"

He heated the pan and added the butter.

"Ok, now watch this," Castle said, adding some of the mixture. It sizzled.

"Cool."

"I know, right?" He grinned. "Ok, another. Careful not to let them though," he said, adding a second lot of batter. "One more."

"This is going to be such a great surprise!" Alexis said.

"You betcha!" Castle agreed. "I think you'll win daughter of the year for this, Alexis."

She laughed.  
"Daughter of the year!"

"Daughter of the year! Daughter of the century! Daughter of the millennium!"


	5. Breakfast in Bed

"Now, if you thought the pancakes cooking was cool, check this out," Castle said, lifting the pan. "Ready?"

"I don't know, Daddy, are _you_ ready?"

Castle did a double-take.  
"Oh... you." He grinned. "Ok, here we go." Grabbing a spatula, he flipped each pancake, Alexis applauding every time he did. He then put the pan back on the stove top and turned down the temperature. "Oh, you know what the next step is, don't you, Pumpkin?"

"Condiments?"

"Condiments! We have butter, and we also need jelly, whipped cream, syrup, cutlery, a napkin, a plastic plate and tray!"

"I'll get the jelly and cream, Daddy!"

They grabbed what they needed and by then the pancakes were ready. Castle loaded them onto the plate as they set up the tray.

"Should we put the vase of flowers on the tray now?"

"Yes, good idea," Castle said as she neatly placed the vase on the tray.

"Now... " He pretended to bite back tears. "It's so beautiful. Ok, kiddo," he said, picking up the tray and carefully handing it to her. "Can you carry it?"

"Yes Daddy."

"You got it?"

"I got it."

"Ok, well, good luck." He ran out of the kitchen, through the study, into his room, and quickly jumped beneath the covers.

Eventually, she made it to his room, tray in hand.

Castle gave an exaggerated yawn and stretched.

"Alexis? What's going on?"

"Surprise, Daddy!"

"Oh!" Castle said, taking the tray from her, "You made me breakfast in bed?"

"Happy Birthday, Daddy."

"Oh thank you, sweetheart, it looks delicious. Did you do this all yourself?"

She nodded in earnest.

He winked.


	6. For He's a Jolly Good Fellow

"How're you liking your pancakes, Pumpkin?"

She gave him the thumbs up and smiled as she sat at the breakfast table eating. He honestly had no idea where she'd learned her manners from but he found it utterly adorable that she didn't want to talk and eat at the same time. The phone rang. Grinning in anticipation, he answered it.

"Birthday boy speaking."

"Happy birthday, kiddo." His face fell for a fraction of a second, but he smiled for the benefit of his daughter; he had decided he would keep up the façade of a healthy relationship with his mother at least for the next few years; until Alexis had established a relationship with her and he didn't have to be nice to her any more. "Mother, I - what a lovely surprise. I didn't expect you to call."

"Well, of course; it's your birthday. What kind of mother do you think I am? Don't answer that. Any way, how's... Meredith? Is she back from her... off-Broadway tour yet?"

"Not yet," Castle said.

"Is she at least going to fly in today to visit you?"

"My understanding is she's very busy at the moment."

"Oh, Darling, don't make excuses for her. What kind of wife isn't there for her husband's birthday?"

"A hard-working wife. Mother, you were away a lot for jobs, too, and I never resented you for it."

"Oh really?"

"Ok, so maybe I make a few jokes about it now but I respected that you were a strong, hardworking woman and I hope to instil those same value in Alexis."

"But I always made it back for your birthday."

"And Meredith has been here for all of Alexis's; that's the most important thing."

"I suppose. "

"Besides, she'll call me. She always calls me on my birthday."

"Well, Richard, if you're happy, then, I'm happy."

"I am, Mother." He smiled at his daughter, who was licking syrup off her hand.

"That's terrific. May I speak with Alexis?"

"Of course. Alexis, Grams wants to speak with you," he said, handing her the phone.

"Grams?!" she said excitedly. "Hello! Good." She giggled.

He smiled and walked over to the dressing table to go through the mail. It was mostly boring bills, but he did get a new card from his new publisher, Gina. When he saw a manila envelope from Meredith, he beamed, wondering what she'd gotten him. He stopped beaming when he saw what was inside.

"Love you, too Grams. Bye!" She got up from the table and ran to her father, who picked her up as she handed him the phone.

"Grams had to go. But she hopes you have a great day."

Castle nodded absent-mindedly.

"Daddy?"

He shook himself out of his reverie.  
"Sorry, Alexis, I just got a story idea." Technically it wasn't a lie; he'd gotten an idea about a female serial killer who extracted men's testicles out of their eye sockets; but that one wasn't exactly appropriate to share with Alexis just yet.

"Daddy?"

"Mm?"

"Can I go clean up my room?"

He cracked a genuine smile in spite of himself.  
"You want permission to clean your room?"

She nodded.  
"Of course you can, Pumpkin."

He put her down, kissing her, and she went up the stairs. Castle sighed and stared at the phone. He knew he should call Meredith and find out what the hell was going on; were the divorce papers some kind of sick April Fool's Day joke? But part of him didn't want to know. He sat down at the table, the phone and the envelope in front of him for several moments.

Then the phone rang. He answered tentatively.  
"Castle."  
"Have you been a good boy, Ricky?" Meredith's voice, free of any evidence that anything was wrong, floated over the phone.  
"Meredith, do you care to explain a little package I received today?"

"Is that a euphemism, Richard? Because I can assure you your package is anything but - "

"The Divorce papers, Meredith. Tell me this is some kind of misunderstanding... a mix-up." There was a pause.

"Those came in today?"

All the blood rushed from his face. So this was real then? She really wanted to call it quits after four years and a beautiful daughter?

"Yes, they did," he said, trying to keep his voice steady.

"Well... that's unfortunate timing."

"_Unfortunate?_ What the hell is going on, Meredith? You always acted like everything between us was fine. Sure, we don't see each other as often as we'd like - "

"Look, Richard, it's not anything you did. I'm just not cut out for this marriage thing. I tried it; it's not for me."

"Well... I didn't always think it was for me, either, Meredith, but we can't just forget the vows that we made to each other. I wasn't kidding around when I said "'til death do us part". I mean, let's not be hasty, here. We can try counselling - "

"Counselling? Richard, I don't have the time to work on this marriage; I have a career to worry about. We can pretend things are ok until they become unbearable or we can get out while we still like each other. This doesn't have to change things, Richard. It just means we're both free; neither of us are tied down."

"Is that it? Are Alexis and I tying you down?"

"Richard, you know I adore Alexis. I was - I was very young when I married you. It seemed like a very romantic, spontaneous thing to do at the time, but all that's worn off now and I... I don't see myself only sleeping with one guy for the rest of my life and I'm sure you don't want to just be with one woman, either. I mean, I've seen how you look at other women - "

"Just because I admire other women doesn't mean I want to cheat on you, Meredith."

"Oh, Richard you don't have t pretend any more. You're not a one-woman man; you never have been. If you like other women, sleep with them. Why does it have to be such a big deal?"

Castle took a deep breath.  
"Who is he?"

"What?"

"The guy you're sleeping with; what's his name?"

"Now, that is neither here nor there."

"So you admit it? You're having an affair."

"_Affair_? No. I just... Richard, maybe if you were with me it would be different."

"Well, I'm sorry but I'm here taking care of our daughter who barely sees you - "

"And I love you for that, Richard. But see? I'm not cut out for this. I can't stay faithful without you here with me and I can't be there when you need me; and I think you knew all this when you married me but maybe you were hoping I would change. Well, I'm not going to change, Rick... I'm sorry." There was another pause. \

"So... this is just it, then?"

"It doesn't have to be - not completely. But our marriage is over, yes."

He sighed.  
"Ok. Ok, if that is really what you want."

"It is. Can I talk to Alexis?"

"Are you going to... mention this?"

"I think I'll let you take care of that."

Of course. She always let him be the one to take care of things. To take care of Lexis. She was right. Part of him had been hoping that would change; but why should he expect Meredith to be anything other than who she was? He went upstairs and handed the phone to his daughter, who was very excited to speak with her mother.

"Mommy, are you coming home soon?"

Castle sucked in a breath. This would be much more bearable if they hadn't had a child. If he was honest with himself, it would have been over a lot sooner if it hadn't been for Alexis. As much as he loved Meredith, he couldn't really see a future with her, but he wanted so badly to give Alexis everything, and that included a family, a mother and father who loved each other, possibly a little brother or sister, that he had stuck it out with her mother in hopes that things would get better.

"Yeah, I understand. I miss you! Love you too. You wanna speak to Daddy again? Ok, bye Mommy!" She hung up. "Sorry, Daddy, Mommy's real busy; but she says she'll be back when she can."

"I'm sure she will. Mommy loves you very much, Pumpkin. But she's... working. You know, she's going to be a big movie star, and Daddy's very proud of her."

"I'm proud of her, too, Daddy. It'd be nice if she was around more, though."

"Yeah," he said, hugging her. "It would. But I'll make sure you see her as soon as possible. Until, then, it's just gonna be you and me for a while, ok, Kiddo?"

She nodded.  
"I like it when it's just you and me, Daddy."

He kissed her forehead.  
"Me, too."


	7. 1999

At first he didn't know what had woken him; he simply rubbed his eyes and groaned when he saw the clock. It was midnight. Then he realised the phone was ringing.  
"Castle," he muttered, his voice laced with sleep.

"Happy Birthday, Kitten."

"Meredith?" he asked, opening his eyes again. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong; I always call you on your birthday; did you really think a little thing like us getting divorced would change that?"

"Meredith, it's midnight. Couldn't you wait until daylight to call me?"

"Well, yes, but I didn't want to wake Alexis by knocking."

Now he was awake.  
"Are you here?"

"Surprise, Ricky."

He rolled out of bed and went through the study to the living room, opening the door. There she was, an overnight bag in hand.

"Meredith, wh - Did things not work out with your place in Malibu?"

"Oh, no, I love it. I'd forgotten what the sun looked like." She wrapped her arms around him.

"Um, so, how are things with... Jason Whatshisname?"

"James? I told you that was never serious, Richard." She kissed him.

Once the shock had worn off, he broke off.  
"Meredith... our divorce was finalised last week. It's a little late to seek reconciliation."

"Reconciliation? Richard, I'm not here to get back together. I came to visit Alexis and I thought, well, while I'm here..." Her fingertips crawled down his chest to his crotch, where she gently cupped him.

He gasped.

"Meredith... you're crazy. You know that?"

She grinned.  
"Well, you know what they say about crazy people," she said, nibbling his earlobe. "The sex is amazing."

He stared at her for a moment, grinned and pulled her inside. He couldn't argue with her there.


	8. 2013

Castle and Beckett had spent the night at the apartment she had rented for his surprise. It still blew his mind, the trouble she had gone to in order to pull this off - and how creative she'd gotten once all the guests had left, despite his current physical limitations. She had brought him back to the loft that morning, made him breakfast, showered - turning down his proposal to get even more creative - changed, kissed him goodbye and gone to work to solve her case. Castle checked his messages. He'd left his phone at home when he'd rushed to "rescue" his conniving girlfriend. He grinned. He had truly met his match in every way.

There were a couple of nice messages from his poker friends. Three missed calls from Meredith.

That's right, she always called him on his birthday; he'd never missed it before. He hadn't even been expecting it this year; he supposed he'd been a little preoccupied lately. He also had a text from her:  
_Happy Birthday, Kitten. XOXOXO_

He had thought for sure when he met Meredith he would never meet someone as unpredictable who would drive him as crazy. And he'd been right. Beckett was even less predictable than Meredith and as far as driving him crazy... well, Meredith would always have a certain knack for that, but the sort of insanity brought on by one Katherine Beckett was of the kind he very much preferred.

**I know this one was short but the next chapter will be longer.**


End file.
